Thursday, September 5, 2013

GUEST POST: How to write a sex scene, and also be more sexy in real life.

Today we have the often hilarious, always hot Mimi Strong giving us some valuable tips of getting sex scenes on the page and in real life.

In writers' forums, I frequently hear the lament of some author dreading the writing of an upcoming sex scene. This author says something like, “How am I supposed to get excited about writing yet another sex scene?”

My answer to this is: Don't.

Don't sit down and say you're going to write a sex scene.

How would your sweetheart react if you walked into the room and said, “Okay, whatever. Let's just have sex now because it's in my planner.”

That is a trick question, because fifty percent of sweethearts would clap their hands and say, “Yay!”

Your characters, however, won't be as enthusiastic.

So, here's an idea: Why not start something up, like a massage or a tickle fight or that thing where you pretend to fellate a breadstick in a fancy restaurant? You can also try these tips in real life. You're welcome!

What purpose does your sex scene serve in your story? Does it heighten tension, or create intimacy? Relax, because you can still accomplish that whether the train goes into the tunnel or not.

The same is true in real life. If you want to feel close to your partner, get close. Snuggle up on the couch, then kiss your partner's neck during the commercial break. Maybe your partner will gaze over at you, like he or she just realized you were in the room. Say something flattering, like, “Baby, you're so good with the remote control. I love how masterful you are at getting the volume just right.”

Your partner will give you side-eye and ask if you're angling for the rest of the dark chocolate bar you've been sharing.

You say, “No, baby, that's all yours,” and for this you will be rewarded with the final square, fed to you lovingly. It's the good chocolate, too, the organic stuff that's $3.99 a bar on sale, harvested by chanting monks on a faraway mountainside. (Don't get too bogged down in the details. One or two adjectives is enough. They could be boring monks who don't chant.)

You kiss your sweetheart to show your appreciation, and you let your lips linger. Maybe in thirty seconds when your show comes back on, you'll snuggle up together and watch Dexter murder someone as you're safe in your lover's arms, or maybe you'll hit the pause button and make your neighbors wish you had thicker curtains. Either way, you made the first move, and you'll be rewarded with something.

Be sexy and be safe, unless it's fiction!

Mimi Strong writes chick-lit, erotic romance, sex comedy, and new adult contemporary romance. Most of her characters have a strong sense of humor. 

Mimi's latest book is out today!  Check out STARLIGHT!

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